While I was hunting up entertaining links for my most recent letters column, I came across this forum thread.
Well, I call it a thread. It's actually one post that led me to a fun page, followed by the most atomically disgusting comment spam it has been my misfortune to encounter in the whole of my sheltered little life.
Oh, I know that some people may be more horrified by filthy porno comment spam, or by hundreds of little one-link comments; it's a matter of (dis)taste. There's just something about the sheer one-paragraph, 300-link onslaught of these particular spammers that particularly tickles my own killing urge.
27 February 2007 at 5:09 am
Urgh. Still, phpBB is quite vulnerable to this sort of spam unless some basic precautions are taken.
Out of curiousity, what would you do should you ever meet a spammer in person? No holds barred with a Dredd(ian) attitude to the law...
27 February 2007 at 5:46 am
An insanity defense has a better chance of success if you kept beating, stabbing, kicking and biting at your victim long after they were dead.
Sometimes things just fit together perfectly, don't they?
27 February 2007 at 1:21 pm
you don't want them to die too quickly, though. not unless it looks like there's a chance they'll get away. in that case, better safe than sorry.
27 February 2007 at 2:55 pm
Maybe if you get some of your friends to join in you could claim mob hysteria.
Personally, I like to make their lives hell in varied and interesting ways. It may not make them go away, but each little victory is very, very sweet.
27 February 2007 at 10:12 pm
Great quote from the site linked to.
"The GSIC-10 Intelligent Chip
Pure shite. That's all I have to say."
28 February 2007 at 5:26 am
I have a motto regarding this sort of thing : Never kill, only maim - you can do that more than once!
I'm thinking some of the varied intsruments used by the Spanish Inquisition would be far far too kind for your average spammer - an I'm not talking about the "Comfy Chair" either!
2 March 2007 at 9:24 am
http://aussie3g.com/modules.php?name=Forums&file=viewtopic&t=20055
234 links in a single posting in a spam thread.
Note that the website is "Aussie 3G", and the spamming isn't in our national language...
2 March 2007 at 2:15 pm
Don't worry, though - the Jamster pages that every single link redirects to are in English, or as close to it as the seething pit of contagious mental retardation that is Jamster can manage.
3 March 2007 at 11:29 pm
What would I do if I captured a spammer, and the law allowed me to do whatever seemed good to me? Probably strap 'em in a chair and force them to watch 1000 continuous hours of back-to-back car dealership commercials.